RISE LIKE A PHOENIX

 Is it possible to hold your hand while I navigate this life of mine?

Can you reassure me that I am doing the best I can and everything will be fine?

At time I feel like a shadow wanting to shine like the sun. But feeling lost with what still need to be done.

Inside I harbour a defiant soul that rages to stay alive,

Rages but become silent when desperaton kicks in to survive.

I am intimidated by the stoic faces that hide humble hearts,

Even though I know they won't hurt me,

I still seems to inwardly fall apart.

I have learned to shelter my inner demon,

To the point, I'm ashamed, they become close friends.

But I know my happiness is something they loath and wish to end.

I forget what it feels like to get a good night sleep these last few days,

Anxiety has welcomed insomnia back into the pictures,

Melatonin is my only ally in this nocturnal fight.

I'm afraid I feel somewhat lost in the face of what is yet to come,

And yet,

I am hopeful,

That I have nothing to fear,

And no reason to run.

I have no reason to feel cornered with my back against wall,

I have faith that will find my way through,

And rise like a phoenix after this fall.